Untitledopen to suggestions
by WildernessGirlCookies
Summary: Mal/Inara...Post BDM...Mal is dealing with Book's death...It's already at the top of the page.


Untitled(open to suggestions)

Disclaimer: Everything here belongs to Joss(except the idea)I own nothing.

Pairing: Mal/Inara(implied)

Summary: Post BDM, I can forgive you guys for killing Shepherd and Wash, mostly because it's what inspired me to write this.

Mal wanders into Shepherd's old room. Soul-searching ensues. Plus a kick ass song by Alter Bridge called "In Loving Memory".

Thanks for all you've done

I've missed you for so long

I can't believe you're gone

Serenity was grieving. She felt the loss as much as the Captain did, as much as the crew did. Mal could no longer hear the soothing hum of the ships engine. He could hear nothing but the fractured beat of his damaged heart. Would it ever heal?

He shuffled quietly into Shepherd's old quarters, making no noise as if not to wake him. But the dead don't wake.

You still live in me

I feel you in the wind

You guide me constantly

He dropped onto the bed, and fished Shepherd's Bible out of his pocket. He'd taken it when they left. The only thing left of Derrial Book. His eyes lingered on the cover. He hadn't opened a Bible since the war. All the promises, the encouragement, the love didn't mean anything to him anymore.

I never knew what it was to be alone, no

'Cause you were always there for me

You were always waiting

And I'll come home and I miss your face so

Smiling down on me

i close my eyes to see

He sighed heavily and drop the Bible on the bed. He was so tired. Maybe he could just rest here a while.

And I know, you're a part of me

And it's your song that sets me free

I sing it while I feel I can't hold on

I sing tonight, 'cause it comforts me

Before he lay down he took one last glance at the Bible, picked it up and grasped it tightly in his hand.

I carry the things that remind me of you

In loving memory of

The one that was so true

You were as kind as you could be

And even though you're gone

You still mean the world to me

As he dozed off, he didn't notice Inara creeping into the room. She stood in the doorway, smiling sadly down at him. She crossed the floor and sat on the bed on the opposite side of the room. She liked watching Mal sleep. It was peaceful.

I never knew what it was to be alone, no

'Cause you were always there for me

You were always waiting

But now I come and it's not the same, no

It feels empty and alone

I can't believe you're gone

Inara sighed sadly at the sight of Mal clinging desperately to Shepherd's Bible, like a scared child. Though deep down she'd always suspected that that was what he was. He was lost like his crew, but was constantly trying to find his way back home, when there was no home to go to.

And I know, you're a part of me

And it's your song that sets me free

I sing it while I feel I can't hold on

I sing tonight 'cause it comforts me

Everyone had been shaken by the deaths of Wash and Shepherd Book, but none had been shaken so hard as Mal. If there was one thing Inara knew about Captain Malcolm Reynolds, it was he loved his crew and he felt the loss deeper than anyone, save Zoe.

There were many reasons she loved Mal, but the main reason was that love he had for his crew. His unshakable loyalty. His determination to keep his crew, his family, from harm, even when it was impossible.

I'm glad he set you free from sorrow

I'll still love you more tomorrow

And you will be here with me still

And what you did you did with feeling

And you always found the meaning

And you always will

And you always will

And you always will

"Mal, I--," Inara began but stopped herself._ Stupid,_ she thought to herself, _he's asleep, he wouldn't hear me anyway. _

A moment later, Mal began to stir. he opened his slowly, taking in his surroundings.

"Gos se" He sat up abruptly when his eyes stopped on Inara. "Inara, I was just—just cleaning the place out a bit for you, for when—you know. I 'll leave you to settle in."

He was just about to stand up when Inara rose and crossed the room to him, giving him an understanding smile as she sat beside him. "Stay," She breathed.

_Damn, girl,_ he thought to himself, _if you're using your wiles on me, it's sure as hell working._

His mouth had gone dry, and he merely nodded.

"How are you holding up?" She asked him quietly.

"Fine, fine...Just doin' a bit of thinkin'" He stood up and crossed the room, keeping his back to Inara.

"Thinking about what?" She was about to stand and go to him, but thought she might scare him away.

"Just wonderin' if there was anything I could've done...Saved Shepherd and the little critters," Mal was trying to sound nonchalant, but his voice was cracking, "Thinking that maybehaps, if he hadn't met me, he might still be bringing religiosity to the fuzzy-wuzzies right now."

Inara heart wrenched at his pain.

"Wonderin' where I'm supposed to go from here."

He turned to her, hoping for an answer, but finding only more questions, he turned back and wiped his eyes wearily.

"I don't know," Inara stood up and crossed the room to him and laid her hand on his shoulder, rubbing it gently with her thumb, "But I do know this, Mal, we will go with you to the end of the universe." She said it with so much passion and conviction that it brought tears to Mal's eyes, he reached up and wiped them away, hoping Inara didn't notice.

"Does that mean you're staying?" He asked trying to keep his voice steady.

"Why would I want to leave Serenity?"

Mal turned to her, caressing her face. "Good answer"

And I know, you're a part of me

And it's your song that sets me free

I sing it while I feel I can't hold on

I sing tonight 'cause it comforts me


End file.
